One year ago today I started the Journey With Me blog. One year ago today I put my struggle and my truth out there for the world to know. I nervously posted my first story on my Facebook feed and had eye-opening conversations with many friends in person who didn’t know about my struggle. I’m so glad I started to share my journey and it’s proven to be just that, a journey. I have reached mountain tops only to fall to a valley. I have taken wrong turns. I have ended up in circles for a while. But overall I do feel like a different person, more free, authentic, and honest than before.
Biggest Growth: Food Freedom
I have come a LONG way in finding freedom from the food rules I placed on myself for years and making food neutral. I am so proud of myself! In the last year I’ve been able to do some things like:
- Eat chips and guac when we go out for Mexican food and not feel guilty
- Order a mixed drink with girlfriends and not worry about sugar
- Go out for ice cream after dinner and not shame myself over sugar
- Keep chocolate in our house
- Put butter my bread and not feel like I’m a “bad person”
- Eat any carb I want to and not feel shame
- Put cheese on anything I want to and not bash myself
- Drink hot chocolate on a cold snowy day
Biggest Struggle: Body Acceptance
While this new found food freedom has been exactly what my mind needed, it’s come with weight gain and my journey with body acceptance is still a struggle. I continue to compare myself to myself from a few years ago when I weighed less. I continue to be mean to myself when I see my reflection in the mirror. I continue to give myself a hard time when I need to buy bigger clothes. I continue to criticize myself in pictures. Like I said, it’s been a journey and it will continue to be a journey.
Next Steps: Mental Fitness
Deciding to share my struggle and story was inspired by the similar story and complete turnaround of my friend Julianne Condia. Despite me moving to a different state, she is still a constant source of inspiration and motivation in my life. She finds the most amazing personal development resources around topics like body image, self-worth, goal setting, motivation, and positivity to share with her team via a fantastic Facebook group and numerous zoom calls that connect people together in community. Throughout this year I have come to learn that getting “healthier” is not about working out or what I’m eating as much as it’s about what I’m thinking and saying to myself. I need to work on my mindset and thought life. I need to get mentally fit. So I’ve decided to join my friend Julianne’s team in order to be intentional and accountable with a like-minded community to move forward on this journey!
